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Dear Friends,
This article
comes to us through one of our board members. Being the parent of 2
teenagers, he faces challenges in how to effectively connect with them on
a daily basis. See if you can relate to his story...
Raising a
modern day know-it-all
"To listen to some parents, they would
say the teenage years are something like a roller coaster. Just hang on
and pray and it will all be over in a few short years. Although I would
certainly agree with the “praying part,” I believe there is a lot more to
it than that.
Take the “Know It All” years. In our house,
according to my wife, we have two “know it alls” in the house – my son and
I. But where I have been able to temper my answers to many questions
(whether I know it or not), my son has not yet mastered the art. So at
this point we just make it a game. When we need to have an answer to one
thing or another, we just ask our son. He doesn’t seem to mind. I guess if
you know everything, you might as well be a good son and help your parents
with a thing or two. Now don’t get me wrong, he does have some amazing
insights for a teenager - but just a little on the green side!
How
about the time we were at the beach on a lake and just off the cuff he
tells me “I bet I could swim to that island and back without a problem.”
“Really,” I said. “Do you know how far that is?” “Oh it’s not that far, I
could make it.” “Ok, but don’t do it without letting me know so I can get
the kayak ready to come and save you.” Sure enough the time came where
some other “know it all” kid told his parents that their blow up whale toy
would be do fine in the lake without blowing away. It didn’t. As the whale
toy blew across the barrier lines I shouted to my son. “Hey _______ (I’ll
protect the innocent here) go get that blow up toy.” Immediately, like he
actually listened to me, he dove into the water and started swimming
toward the blow up whale not calculating completely how fast the wind was
taking it. After 75 yards or so of hard swimming to try to catch it, he
finally gave up. Now he was tired and I was a bit worried. (…I tried to
keep reminding myself - he said he could swim to the island and he is not
even that far yet). While I was sitting there thinking, his mother was
running toward the beach yelling at him to come back and forget the toy.
And his Aunt was running toward the kayak to go to save him.
Well
I’m happy to report things worked out fine. My son got back to the shore
having been pulled behind the kayak by his aunt, and my wife stopped
looking at me with a look that said “I’m going to throw you in next time.”
It seems to me that two know it alls should have been able to save a
stupid blow up toy. I guess we were both wrong that time.
Even
though your teenagers look and act like they don’t need you it’s simply
not true. Whether it’s physically saving him or her on a lake, or praying
that God will protect them from all the world dishes out. It is imperative
that we do one last thing for them. Stay engaged - Be there. Forget the
quality versus quantity debate. No amount of quality time would save your
son from drowning in a lake. You need to be there.
Take the time
this weekend to engage your kids - especially teens. They may not show you
they need it but they do. And better than a high yield saving account, the
dividends are eternal. …And there’s no small print!"
Thank you for that wonderful example
of how important it is that we are there for our children - regardless of
how old they are. I once heard a speaker say that kids spell love -
T-I-M-E. Take the time this week.
Celebrating families,
Bruce McCracken |
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